Creating Our Own Destiny

"Each of us is master of his or her own destiny." (Isabel Allende, Ines of My Soul, 286)

How can we control our own destiny? Do we do what is expected of us and leave it up to fate or do we take matters into our own hands? If we want to be rich, do we wait for Publishers Clearing House to come knocking on our door with a big check? We know this will likely never happen. However, if we truly want something to happen, then we need to focus on what we want and create our own destiny.

This reminds me of a story in Robert Kiyosaki's book, Rich Dad Poor Dad. Robert is a nine year old boy who wants to earn some money. He works extremely hard for his friend's dad making very little money. He soon realizes there has to be a better way to earn money than what he is doing. At this point, he takes his destiny into his own hands and looks for a better way to earn the money. Opportunity comes in finding discarded comic books. He and his friend open up a comic book library and employs his friend's sister to run it for $1 a week. They allow kids to come read the comics for a small fee. Soon they are making $9.50 a week without even having to run the business. This is a prime example of taking control of your destiny. Robert wanted a better way to earn money, put his mind to it and achieved it.

That is how I think of Ines as well. She never settled for what was expected. She was constantly taking control of her destiny. The example that comes to mind best is when Pedro boots her out and she is ordered to leave Chile. Instead of accepting this news, she focuses on how she can stay in Chile. She then takes her destiny in her own hands and proposes to Rodrigo. She then becomes his wife allowing her to stay in Chile. We could all learn from Robert and Ines in focusing on what we want and creating our own destinies.

Dogged Determined

"I was dogged in the challenge of building a community, a task that in the New World was left to women."  (Isabel Allende, Ines of My Soul, 164)

  

 
Its funny how one simple word, can change the whole meaning of a sentence.  When I first read this quote, I thought that Ines was saying that the men were making the women build up the community.  It gave me an impression that she was simply given a task to do.  Then I looked up the definition of dogged.  It means to have tenacity, show persistence and determination.  Ines was actually feeling opposite that what I originally thought.  She was determined and passionate about building up her community.

Her passion and determination reminds me of several women in history who exhibit these same characteristics for a cause they deem worthy.  One of these examples is Joan of Arc during the French Revolution.  She led the French armies to several victories, which led the way for Charles VII to become king.  She is a French heroine.

Another example is Amelia Earhart.  She was the first woman pilot to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.  She broke several records and became instrumental in creating an organization for female pilots.  She became a role model for every woman to strive to achieve her dreams.

These are just a couple of examples of women that through their passion and determination have made a difference in the world.  Ines is another one of these women.  Not only did she make a difference by building up the community for herself and all those that lived there, but she went on to save the city from an attack of the Mapuche Indians and helped to found Chile.  If we are "dogged" determined, than any of us, man or woman, can build communities, reach our dreams, or even become heroes.

Perspective

“Man is the only being who knows he is alone, and the only one who seeks out another.” 

(Octavio Paz, The Labyrinth of Solitude, 195)

 

Life is about perspective.  If we look at the picture above, what do we see?  Some people might look at the picture and assume that it is a picture of an old hag.  Which is correct, but is that all there is to the picture?  We need to change our perspective or way of thinking to be able to see the young lady.

Life is this way.  We can choose to see it one way or see it another.  It is all about perspective.  When I came across this quote, it reminded me of an experience my son had starting Junior High this last fall.  It was a new school, new schedule and new students.  For a 13 year old that is very scary.  For those first few weeks, he would come home very sad and lonely.  He felt that all of his friends no longer wanted to be friends and all the other kids already had friends and were not interested in being his friend.  Even at church functions he was all alone while his friends would hang out together.  We even had his scout leaders come to us concerned about him.

As a mother, I wanted to help him.  I had to convince him that he was so focused on being alone that he couldn't see the opportunities to meet new friends.  Each day, I would challenge him to say "hi" to someone new.  At scouts, I would challenge him to force himself to be happy and outgoing.  As his focus changed from himself to others, so did his attitude.  He soon found himself meeting new friends and enjoying school and those around him.

Like the quote mentioned above, my son was the only one aware that he was alone, but he was also the only one that could seek out another.  We have the ability to make what we want out of life.  It's all in our perspective.

What is Your Story?

Have you ever seen the show on BYUtv called the Story Trek?  Todd Hansen is a reporter that travels through Utah knocking door to door inviting people to share their stories on TV.  The majority of the time, people feel that they don’t really have a good story to share, but are willing to tell it anyway.  Like these people, I don’t feel that I have a great story to share yet, but I’m also willing to share it.

I was actually born in Utah, but only lived here a short time before my family moved to Idaho.  I have lived in Idaho my whole life and consider myself an Idahoan.  So I was quite surprised to find that my life had led me back to the state that I was born in.  Who knows, maybe I will eventually consider myself a Utahn. 

I have always been a very determined person.  When I put my mind to something I do it.  While a Senior in high school, I was anxious to graduate and start my career.  There was a program that I participated in my senior year that allowed me to do internships in fields that I thought were interesting.  One of these particular internships was with the Prosecutors Office.  The lady I worked with confided in me that she had one of the hardest jobs, but one of the most rewarding jobs.  She worked with children who had been abused or hurt in some way and had to testify in court.  She was able to help them through that difficult experience.  I knew that this was what I wanted to do too.  So I went to a vocational college into the same program that she did.  A year and a half later, I graduated as a Legal Office Technician.

It's funny how life sometimes throws you curve balls.  That is what happened to me.  I remember the last week of school, one of my professors called me into her office.  She said that the FBI had contacted them and was asking for a few of the students to apply for a couple of vacancies they had opened in their support center.  She asked that I apply and before I knew it I was the youngest employee at that office, at age 19, working for the FBI.  I had some incredible experiences while working there and loved every minute of it. 

After five years with the FBI, my husband graduated from college and received a job that required us to move.  I felt okay about leaving the FBI, because I was ready to be a stay at home mother.

I now have four children and my youngest started Kindergarten this year.  I decided that now would be a great time to go back to school.  I have always wanted to get my bachelor's degree.  I am now in my second semester here at BYU and really enjoying this new adventure in my life.  I am not sure where my story will lead me, but I know that I am making a great one and maybe one day I will receive a knock on my door and be asked to share it.